Knowing how offended the NZRFU get when the All Blacks perform their Haka and an opposing team looks at it/moves towards it/stands in a semi-circle in front of it/ignores it/asks them to do before an anthem/throw grass in the air, etc….it is probably for the best the NZRFU take little interest in Czech domestic rugby (as covered on the Terrace in February):
Proboha!
The East Terrace is greatly saddened to report that Sam Warburton will be wearing a red scrum cap in the Six Nations (see The East Terrace’s 100% correct viewpoint on scrum caps here).
A column in the Daily Torygraph has revealed the terrible news:
“I am definitely more of a target at the breakdown these days – I am getting a lot of elbows and knees. I am really getting smashed and I am getting headaches for a couple of days after games. That’s why I now wear a head guard – I have got a special red one for the Six Nations.”
The East Terrace never thought that a man who responded so elegantly to a red card in a world cup semi-final, refuses to complain about anything and, generally, has so much class and elegance would succumb to the greatest blight of modern rugby. Especially a red one.
Please join us all in a moment of silence as we absorb this sad news.
Update: Sam Warburton will serve a one match suspension from TheEastTerrace.com ESPNScrum Fantasy team for this revelation.
Long time readers of The East Terrace will remember this highly valued award (for those that missed it follow this LINK). It is awarded to those who refuse to go all common (read soccer like) after grounding the ball for a five point score, and simply trot back to their allocated field position to receive the forthcoming kick off.
For these true men there are no vulgar acts of fist-pumping, no interaction with the frenzied mob watching and no (God, forbid) premeditated hand signals or body movements. True men simply shake a few hands (maybe gracefully accept a few encouraging pats on the bottom) and simply get on with it.
We award Jonny for a career full of such dignified moments, but none more so than this calm reaction after a hugely well taken and very important try:
We leave you with a quote from Mr. Wilkinson in the Guardian this week:
“I’m not necessarily proud of the World Cups and the grand slams won or lost, the amount of points scored, this record or that. What I am proud of is I have searched for the best of me and I have been a team man without fail.”
Are you reading Mr. Armitage and Mr. Ashton?
The IRB and referee Craig Joubert have proudly performed a near flawless coronation ceremony of New Zealand as world champions.
On a glourious Sunday night in Eden Park, the All Blacks were guided towards the 2011 World Cup title in an exciting coronation ceremony in which the illusion of a genuine contest was presented to millions of armchair fans around the world.
There was only one minor hitch during the ceremony when, possibly out of nerves, Joubert accidently penalised New Zealand captain Richie McCaw for an infringement. The incredulous look on McCaw’s face spoke volumes of the flanker’s displeasure. However, normal service was resumed and the rest of the ceremony passed without incident.
By our rugby correspondent Mr. L.R. Jowett
England 13 Argentina 9
For England: Try by B. Youngs. Penalty goals by J. Wilkinson (2). Conversion by J Wilkinson.
For Argentina: Penalty goals by unidentified (3).
No event in recent rugby football history has been so anticipated amongst the rugby fraternity as the opening match of England’s 2011 Rugby World Cup campaign.
Despite the fixture taking place far off in our most distant colonies, the amazing advances in communication technology in the modern era meant eyes from all over the civilised world were able to ‘tune in’ (if I may use modern parlance) and watch our stout yeomen take on the fiery South Americans.
The offences against the true spirit of rugby union in and around this encounter were manifold and, if the reader will permit me, I would like to indulge in a short tirade against these before moving onto the match itself.
I realise that to rally against the payment of players in modern rugby is to be of little avail, but I am personally still left with a sour taste in my mouth when I see so many young men spending their youth idly pursuing sporting honours rather than contributing to society in a more meaningful way. However, I am fully aware that bird has flown, so to speak, and will not return to the subject for the time being.
Furthermore, whatever the outcome of the matches themselves, I am still uncomfortable with the RFU’s decision to award full caps for matches against junior countries like Argentina. I remember in 1905 Scotland did not even deem the mighty New Zealand worthy of full cap status. I wonder what these leading administrators would make of today’s culture of awarding caps against all manner of lowly nations. I am of the firm belief it devalues our great game.
What is more, whilst one can admire the technical dexterity of the Colonials in Dunedin in building a rugby stadium with a roof, one wonders if the spectacle of rugby really should be played in such artificial conditions? Are not the elements of wind, rain, sleet and snow as much a part of rugby football as scrum time and lineouts?
And finally, before we move on to a report of the game itself, I must express my outrage at England wearing anything but white when playing. Even if there is a potential clash of regalia with opponents, surely as England are the founders and true guardians of the game it is for other teams to change colours? And if we are to use this method of numbering players like cattle (I am still uncomfortable with this dehumanising of our men) could it not be possible to affix numbers which do not disintegrate upon contact and leave us looking most slovenly? One cannot help but come to the conclusion than the outfits of the Englishmen had a negative impact on the team’s general mental constitution and the sporting goods firm Nike should be thoroughly ashamed of their crass and inferior product.
With just days remaining before the 2011 World Cup kicks off the New Zealand Rugby Union have launched a high profile campaign to remind the general public that rugby is 'only a game'.
The All Blacks' surprise failure in the Tri-Nations, alongside the ghost of repeated World Cup disappointments, has spurred the NZRU into a proactive attempt to dampen the public's expectations ahead of any potential failure to win the Webb Ellis trophy.
The campaign has been deemed so important that the All Blacks' management and players have delayed the start of their final training camp by a week to go door to door throughout New Zealand and personally speak with members of the public and ask them not to 'get too upset about what is, after all, just a game'. It is estimated the cost of the project will run into several million dollars.
Much to the chagrin of Kiwis everywhere the famous All Blacks have gained a notorious reputation for choking at the game's showpiece event. Every tournament from 1991 to 2007 has seen the men in black enter as favourites only to come unstuck when it matters. On each occasion the public has reacted with not only tears but also anger. Some financial experts even claim the failures damage the country's economy.
The 'It's Only a Game' campaign was kick started by an extraordinary press conference in Auckland on Thursday when head coach Graham Henry said that winning the World Cup would be 'very nice but of little overall importance in the grand scheme of life.."
For the full story: click HERE.
The East Terrace is proud to announce that Mr. Lewis R. Jowett has signed on to write for The East Terrace via Twitter.
Mr. Jowett wrote on rugby from the late 1870s until the early 1900s. He was believed to have perished at the tail end of 1905 whilst watching a rugger match on a bitterly cold December afternoon after forgetting to drink his usual glass of brandy.
However, 106 years later it seems the esteemed writer was simply a tad frozen and has, amazingly, thawed out just a few days ago.
Not wishing to dwell to long on his change of circumstances (and the death of all those who were dear to him), Mr. Jowett has committed himself to commenting on rugby for The East Terrace.
Those interested in following his musings should sign up for his Twitter feed at: http://twitter.com/#!/LRJowett
The Welsh Rugby Union has proudly announced that Wales will most likely underperform/implode in this year’s World Cup whilst wearing ‘revolutionary new jerseys made from military grade fabric’.
The above quote is actually real.
Amongst much other technological drivel and hype the WRU revealed that the socks worn by the players will feature:
- NEW "Dominate Sock" with mapped compression technology.
- Body mapped compression insets to provide anatomical support to key performance zone in the calves.
- ArmourBlock technology to assist in the prevention of odour causing bacteria.
- Embedded arch support to reduce foot fatigue.
- Strategic ventilation to wick moisture and accelerate evaporation.
- ArmourStretch for comfort and a perfect fit.
WRU Group Head of Commercial Craig Maxwell said: "The technological advancements made by Under Armour with this jersey are staggering and have to be seen to be believed and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz….”
It is expected countless fans/sheep will line up to purchase the jersey for anything up to ₤84.99 so they can sit on the sofa drinking beer whilst wearing a shirt which helps to ‘facilitate speed and endurance longevity’ and uses ‘ArmourGrid technology’.
It is not clear at press time if the near magical kit helps with ball retention, lineout efficiency, on field decision making, support lines, angles of running or defensive positioning.
For more vital information/insomnia treatment visit: www.wru.co.uk
The Welsh Rugby Union has unveiled a controversial ticketing policy ahead of their Rugby World Cup warm-up games this summer. Following on from the hugely contentious decision to award caps for the recent exhibition game against the Barbarians, the WRU have announced all Welsh fans who attend the August matches in Cardiff against England and Argentina will be awarded full caps.
Desperate to fill the Millennium Stadium due to ongoing financial burdens, as well as the loss of income from the lack of November internationals in World Cup year, the WRU marketing department believe the policy will lead to both matches being a sell out.
"We are delighted to announce that our match against England on the August 13 should see at least 60,000 new caps awarded," said WRU spokesperson Geriant Williams. "This is a great moment in the proud history of Welsh rugby and a key moment in our 130th Anniversary celebrations. We urge all Welsh fans to get behind the team and reach for that credit card. For as little as £15, plus a small booking fee, you can win your first Welsh cap."
The WRU have revealed that all Welsh fans that purchase tickets and supply documentary proof of Welsh heritage, or can prove at least three years residency in Wales, will be recorded in the WRU record books as internationals. There will be no age or gender barrier to those being awarded caps.
For the full story: http://www.espnscrum.com/wales/rugby/story/142170.html
London Irish and England player Delon Armitage has had his appeal to overturn his eight week ban for ‘bullying and threatening behaviour towards an official’ dismissed.
Armitage is most known in respected rugby circles for his tacky badge kissing celebration after scoring a try at Twickenham against France.
Sadly the RFU lacked the courage to increase Armitage’s ban for having the arrogance to appeal in the first place and for generally acting like a soccer player.
